How can your relationships support your goals and dreams? When we were deciding to start a hemp farm I took stock of my relationship with my friend, Maureen, and the entire Lawrenz family. Starting a business is a big deal. Starting a hemp farm and business with another family is even bigger.
Relationships are an integral part of our lives and influence us in countless ways. Who are you surrounding yourself with? Are these relationships helping you move towards your goals?
Some relationships are important, and we have to put in the effort to make them great. Other relationships are only meant to be for a season of life or a reason.
Part of creating a life you love is to take stock of what you have currently in your life. Do you have relationships with people who are headed in the same direction you are?
Think about the five people you spend the most time with. Are they making choices that support your long term goals? Do they support your values or beliefs? If not, maybe it’s time to start clearing out relationships that are no longer serving you. This can be really hard, but it’s so important because you can’t make room for new relationships if you are hanging onto old ones.
Here is an example – if your goal is to have a happy marriage and your friend is always complaining about her marriage, is this a relationship serving your long term goals?
My husband had a coworker who was not happy in their marriage and would complain about it daily at work. Before we realized it, my husband and I were fighting over nothing. He was just dissatisfied but didn’t know why. We finally figured it out. He was picking up on this person’s dissatisfaction and it was affecting his paradigm. Influence can be subtle so choose your relationships carefully.
How about your relationship with your spouse or partner? It’s probably the most important relationship you have! My goal is to have a happy marriage, and I do what I can to keep it that way.
One of the ways we invest in our marriage is by scheduling two trips a year without our kids. It has been nearly a year since our last get-away, and I can tell it’s been a long time! So, we made time to go up North and take time to decompress and reconnect as a couple.
This isn’t always easy with the demands of life and starting a hemp farm but we are committed to it and make it happen.
Think about what you can do to create the time and connection you want in your closest relationships.
When it comes to other relationships in your life – friends, parents, siblings, and others – what are you doing to invest in them? Relationships are not one-sided.
You’ve heard the expression, “The road to Hell is paved with good intentions.” I feel like that can reflect a lot of relationships.
You have these intentions in your head. But you never act on them. You think “I should really call grandma” or “I should really …” but you never get around to it.
I got my niece a gift online, but it didn’t come in time for Christmas. We wrapped it and it sat near our fireplace for weeks. Then I brought it from Wisconsin to Iowa with me recently thinking “I’ll drop it off when I see her.” To my dismay, when I unpacked the car after returning home, there sat the gift – still wrapped but looking a little ragged now.
Are your relationships like this package? All dressed up and ready to go but never actually getting delivered? Remember other people don’t see your intentions. They only see your actions. They don’t know you are thinking about them. They only know if you do something.
Take the time to actually do something – send the card, make a date, give a gift, shoot them a text – heck get crazy and call them! Find a way to show them you care.
TAKE THE FIRST STEP
You can’t take relationships for granted. They don’t happen by themselves. It takes some effort to make them work and they will deteriorate if you aren’t actually investing in them. Are you fostering the relationships that are meaningful to you? On a road trip to Iowa, I scheduled a lunch date with my little brother. I haven’t had a solo lunch with him for many years since we were kids. And I’m so glad we reconnected it was at this meeting that the idea for starting our hemp farm, Lake Country Growers, was born.
Especially today, as we are quarantined in our homes surrounded by the people we love the most, what are YOU doing to cultivate your relationships?